With a new baby we quickly realised that with fatigue can come laziness! It was too easy once Shipmate was in bed to curl up on the sofa and zone out for a couple of ours before our own bedtime. Worried about the effector this lack of communication on our relationship (and lack of adult conversation for me after baby babble all day, we decided to follow Hannah Maggs’ idea of “Blackout Night”.
Our rules were no tv, phones only for answering limited texts or calls (no getting stuck on eBay or googling!) and we could have music on.
I have to say I loved our first one! It wasn’t the most eventful but it did feel like we had chance to reconnect and have a giggle, which wouldn’t have happened had we vegged in front of the TV!
We are going to do it at least once a week, more if we feel we need it.
Here are some ideas we have come up with to try over the coming weeks!
1. Watch wedding video together. Let’s be honest the wedding video and album stay stuck on the shelf alot! Get it out and reminisce about the day. If your like me have some tissues ready!
2. Game night: and get competitive! We taught each other card games from our childhood whilst listening to CDs from our teenage years!
3. Meal with effort! Include candles, get the special wine glasses out and sit at the table. You could even make a little menu or leave a note for your partner in the napkin
4. Baking: pick a new recipe the day before do you can get the ingredients in and bake something together. It’s good to promote team work between you and achieve a little something together. It’s a lovely reminder all week of your evening together as you eat your treats!
5. Home jobs: I don’t mean cleaning! I mean something you’ve both been meaning to do but never had the rule. Something that will improve your home. For us it was gardening. It was great bring out in the fresh air and good to not have to continue looking at a jungle every day!
6. Truth or dare: you can be as daring as you want! Remember when choosing your questions this is about bringing you closer so don’t go asking things like how many people your partner has slept with!
7. Write down what’s going well, 3 goals for the year and 3 longer term goals. Plan how to get there. Print pictures off to represent them and pop them on the fridge.
8. Research what’s on in the area and book some trips/nights out with and without the kids. It could be festivals, comedy nights, watching a pub band, the theatre. Whatever you’d both enjoy
9. Build a fort and sleep in it (complete with fairy lights, strawberries and wine). Go all Laura Ashley style a la Hannah Maggs
10. Fire and hot chocolate in the garden (must include marsh mallows and cream). This could be a chiminea, fire pit or make your own (safely lol)
11. We have booked tickets to Theatre in the Forest locally as an out and about Blackout Night that we can take Shipmate along to (he will sleep anywhere in the sling!)
Have fun with yours and please comment below how it went or any ideas we can use!